Sometimes we desire something with intensity. It’s not an issue of longing for the forbidden, some unlawful no-no; sometimes we want something that is good that seems reasonable, beneficial, healthy and honorable. Yes, there are times when we submit it to God in prayer, seeking permission and aid to obtain that thing we desire. Perhaps it’s a job. It might be a mate. We have a longing for a friend, a healing, a breakthrough, an open door of opportunity or some blessing of God that we are convinced makes clear sense. We wait, our desire grows, we sense its impending arrival, we just know God is going to make it a reality.
And then it becomes evident that God has said No. The opportunity passes. The door closes. The desire remains unfulfilled. And now we have a brand new issue to think upon: what will be our attitude toward this Divine denial? Will our outlook remain hopeful in God alone? Will our heart harden a little as we convince ourselves that we have been prevented to receive something to which we were entitled? Does bitterness find a home in our hearts? There is an opportunity in this disappointment if we are wise and slow down to consider it: a strong measure of our trust and loyalty can only be discovered in the backwash of the occasion of God telling us No.
“Hope deferred maketh the heart sick: but when the desire cometh, it is a tree of life.” – Proverbs 13:12 {KJV}
Abraham wanted a son and God made the man wait for decades before saying yes. Moses thought he would deliver his people from Egypt but was put in timeout for forty years while God sapped His servant of impulsive self-confidence. King David’s dream was to build a temple for his Maker yet God flatly denied David’s desire and gave it instead to his son, Solomon. Hannah wanted a baby boy and even promised God to dedicate that child to Him; she wept with a broken, longing heart at times as God made her wait until His timing came about. These ancient believers, along with you and me, have all experienced in the heart the thing that the psalmist expressed with his pen when he wrote, “I am weary with my crying out; my throat is parched. My eyes grow dim with waiting for my God.” {Psalm 69:3} If you haven’t accepted it up to this point, now is a good time to humbly acknowledge that God reserves the right to decline our desires, even when they make sense to us. When this happens, I need to quickly grab the reins of my heart so as to not be led off the path of trust, worship and gratitude. His denials serve as my opportunity to deepen in my trust of Him and to learn what it means when we are told that His grace is enough for us (2 Cor. 12:9). Below are some determinations and considerations that have helped me in times like these. I hope they will be a benefit to you also.
- I immediately have to remind myself that God always knows what is best for me
- I have to humble myself and acknowledge that I don’t posses all the information and am potentially blind to some things that were part of the equation. God sees those things and has factored them into His denial of my desire. In His perfect wisdom He has protected me from something that I did not need at the time.
- Every denial serves as a diagnostic of what is the greatest desire of my heart. Did I want that thing more than I wanted what God wants for me? Did the gift supersede the Giver in it’s draw on my heart?
- Can I trust the character and nature of God even when what He is doing makes little sense to me?
- Is it possible that God could do anything wrong in my life? No matter how distressing His denial might be, am I mature enough to praise Him for what He has forbidden me?
- I always endeavor to remember that the denial itself is deeply beneficial for me and meant to bring Him glory and me understanding. There has to be a benefit to my disappointment and it will not likely be discovered on the surface. I must think about what has happened and ask Him for wisdom even as I joyfully accept His determination to withhold from me what I’ve asked.
- I must wait to gain understanding of why He has said No. The waiting has sometimes taken years before clarity comes.
And what about you? I believe you have something to add to the conversation. Maybe you have something that helps you in times like I’m describing. What have you learned from those times in your life when our gracious God tells you No?
Thanks Jeff,
I’ve come to a point where I must acknowledge that HE knows better than me in “ALL” things, and not venture into something, which may seem to many mature Christians something which would bring glory to God, and move ahead of HIM. I’ve learned to take my steps, and wait! Sometimes there is more growth that needs to take place before the venture. If that be the case, God will give the opportunity for the growth, which is happening in my life right now. I made myself available, stepped out, and through wise counsel and wisdom given by God, determined that I should wait on His timing, which is always perfect!
Praise HIM all the time for HIS grace and not giving to me what I deserve.
Thanks Jeff
I go back to Christ crucified for me, glorying like Job is God’s right to be God, so long as I’m saved, possessing all. It is good that we are unworthy of whatever we want, we cannot earn anything, and so now we are more thankful for what we have, and we guard our steps, to make sure that we aren’t the reason of offensive. I’ve found comfort in Phil 4, whether up or down, I can do all through Christ. He is wise, loving, powerful, and working every detail for our benefit and His elect. I am proved and renewed, “Give me Christ”, and peace rules within. It is a bitter life that we walk, bitter herbs, not only feasting and shining. Grace, promises, and the mysterious hand of God that gives us what we need, unasked and unsought.
This gospel is sweet to be shared. ty!!
The things learned are too many, and the list keeps growing. But, what keeps me going is remembering the “yes”s and how incredibly wonderful they are and have been. Jeremiah 9:11 is always near and dear as is Matthew 7:11. As much as I love my children, my LORD loves me more and wants good things for me just as I love my kids. It also serves to remind me to offer grace– even when it is not “deserved”. The lessons keep coming….